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The Most Personal Song I've Ever Written

from House above an Apartment (2015​-​2016 Demos) by Quinn Cicala

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lyrics

Tomorrow I have all the reason in the world to wake up late for work 'cause I hate customers and I hate my job
But lately I've been so happy that I don't even notice
The day pass by me and they won't stop
Maybe it's the weather or the lack of the winter
Maybe it's that I play guitar every day
But either way it doesn't matter, I was born to love and make things shatter
And no one can disturb me in my fate
You see, back when I was in middle school, I thought that everyone else was cool except for me and that really hurt
But then I was in tenth grade, I learned to play my friend's guitar and now I have no trouble saying my words

But those nights where we would drive up all the same streets
And the classes I failed and the lost hours of sleep
I will never forget what everyone in moments meant to me
And those filled notebooks with writing that I can't read and the empty packs that were thrown in the backseat
Even when I'm depressed, I'll still remember all these memories

And I just dropped out of college 'cause I wasn't going anyway
And I wasn't doing well and wasting time
And my family is angry but I know it's justified because I've been handed everything so far in my life
Maybe they're not angry, or maybe they're just worried
Maybe they're afraid I won't go back
But life is life and pain is pain and in the end we're all the same
And maybe a college degree isn't where it was at
When I was growing up, I thought I'd go to school, become a doctor and get lots of cash, marry a beautiful woman and own a nice apartment, save up and eventually become a dad

But those days where we decided to take a road trip and all the money that I spent on shit
If I could take it all back, I don't think I'd take back a thing
And those times where I slept on floors and couches and the dreams I have about getting myself out there
Sometimes I wonder if I could, would I get up and leave?

Sometimes I get depressed and I can't imagine my own future and I find it easy to dive into vice
But I feel so young, I can't see myself getting older
All I wanna do is play this music and play nice
But sometimes there's people in your life that don't see your vision
And those people do no good for you
You should say fuck em, leave em behind
'Cause there's no point in wasting your time and spend it pleasing people that don't even live your life

But all the places that I've been and all the persons that I've met and all the girls that made me smile and all the people I haven't met yet
As I grow old, I hope that I can keep an open mind
'Cause sometimes I just wanna die and I gotta tell myself that it's worth it in those times where I can smile and I don't need help
It's been a rough few months but I don't think that I'd take back a thing
And if I can sing my problems away, I don't think that there's any other way that I can be okay
Oh I'll be okay, I can stay happy

credits

from House above an Apartment (2015​-​2016 Demos), released October 8, 2016

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Quinn Cicala Atlanta, Georgia

for booking: quinncicala@gmail.com

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